I was 10 when my father paid a smuggler to take me out of Tibet

When my editor asked me to report on the secret journey Tibetans take to escape into exile, I did not think that there was much worth writing about. It is the story of almost everyone in my community. It is not news, and we are in the news business.

But as I reported the story, I could feel its power – and it reminded me of details of my own journey that I hadn’t thought about in years.

I was born in Kham, in eastern Tibet, my parents’ first born. A brother and sister followed, and the five of us lived with two cousins in a home that sat in a valley where the Salween River flows, surrounded by farm fields and mountain peaks.

My mom sold produce in a town closer to the border with China, and I remember her taking me with her to pick the fruit to sell, teaching me a little Chinese as we worked. When she sold the fruit, she would bring back Chinese toys. All the neighborhood kids would gather around to play with me and my new plastic guns and cars. I loved the attention the gifts from my mother brought me.

Lobsang Gelek and his housemates at Kempty Falls in Mussoorie, India, during summer vacation in 2006.
(Provided by Lobsang Gelek/RFA Investigative)

I haven’t spoken to my family since then, though I occasionally get word through relatives also in exile that they are safe and healthy. I hope that sometimes they see videos I do for RFA or read articles I write and know that I am well.

Back in Nepal and India reporting for RFA last year, I felt nostalgia and emotion I did not expect after one of the people I interviewed shared a similar story of having walked in the snow with little food.

In just a few weeks, I’ll become a parent myself. As I approach fatherhood, I admit that sometimes I feel anger toward my father for his decision. But I try not to blame him because I know he did what he thought was best for me. And I think he did give me a brighter future – I would never have been here in the U.S., or met my beautiful wife, who, like me, was also smuggled out of Tibet as a child, if I had stayed back.

Like all expecting parents, we’re anxious and excited for what’s to come. One thing I know for sure: I will never send my child far away from me. The pain of separation is something that lingers in your soul, until the moment you can be finally reunited. I still hope for that day.

Edited by Jim Snyder and Boer Deng.

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